A mom’s advice to the teenager
by Tina Isaacs
It’s very easy to be caught up in the things that happen around you – people who seem important enough for you to emulate or hang around with (they say you are who you mingle with, rite?), ideals that need to be chased, clothes need to be worn, words needed to be said – so much so that it’s sometimes difficult to find yourself amongst the utter mess of everything.
You can fake it with most of the people around you but not so much with your closest friends (if you can, perhaps they’re not that close after all?) or your family who has known you all your life. Most importantly, you cannot lie to yourself.
Another thing: if you lie about yourself to others, this becomes obvious to anyone who spends enough time around you, you slip up, you act inconsistently to the situations and events that occur around you, you end up resenting having to keep up the falsity – because it is not natural to you – and you cause pain to yourself, the ones you love and those who love or care about you.
Remember that, although life feels absolutely momentous right now, your teenage years are a transitional period of the life of an average person who lives till their mid-70s. No matter what hardship and sacrifices you make now, these are TEMPORARY. That means if you don’t quite fit in with ‘cool crowd’, are hated by the bullies in school, this is only a temporary phase in your life which will go away once you leave school, become an adult and build a life for yourself.
Getting or achieving your groove is important because it is the beat that takes you on your life’s journey, it is the song that accompanies your every step, it’s the rhythm that swings you through your life. Your GROOVE is what allows you to live your life at its calmness, happiest, most serene and positive.
In order for you to achieve your groove, you need to ask yourself: what rings true to you? What’s true in your heart, what does not hurt or cause you harm, what provides for your long-term wellbeing, and nurtures you as a person, a soul, a spirit?
Find it and be true to yourself.
If you love yourself absolutely and find that groove, regardless of the temporary occurrences around you, it will take you into a happy adulthood, and give you the strength to forge through the building of a strong personal life, and a successful professional life too.
And don’t be afraid to make mistakes. What I mean by that is not to throw caution to the wind (trying everything and anything merely for the purpose of gaining experience in your life). No. That’s wrong. Because, you musn’t forget that some life experiences can scar you FOREVER and some scars can never be taken away from your physical or mental being. What I mean by not being afraid of making mistakes is that when you don’t get it right the first few times, pick yourself up, dust yourself off, don’t be afraid to say “this is not me”, and walk on to forge a new you. Never be afraid to say I’m sorry, especially to the people that you hurt. And never be afraid to say sorry to yourself.
Find your groove.
I wish you a happy journey into adulthood.